Falwell Passes, Will Miss The Rapture

Moral Majority political operative Jerry Falwell died today at age 73 shortly after being found unconscious in his office at Liberty University. It may be crass to say it but Jerry -- the bigoted, pseudo-Christian, right-wing political force -- will therefore have to miss the coming Rapture and Apocalypse. Darn. Falwell quotes:

On 9-11:
“I really believe that the pagans, and the abortionists, and the feminists, and the gays and the lesbians who are actively trying to make that an alternative lifestyle, the ACLU, People For the American Way, all of them who have tried to secularize America. I point the finger in their face and say 'you helped this happen.'"

On AIDS:
"AIDS is not just God's punishment for homosexuals; it is God's punishment for the society that tolerates homosexuals"

On global warming:
"I believe that global warming is a myth. And so, therefore, I have no conscience problems at all and I'm going to buy a Suburban next time."

"Satan's attempt to redirect the church's primary focus from evangelism to environmentalism.

"Naive Christian leaders, in fact, have been duped—DUPED, I say—by dirty hippies like Al Gore. An Inconvenient Truth? HAH, it should be called A Convenient Untruth, Oscar be damned."

On born again or else:
"If you're not a born-again Christian, you're a failure as a human being."

On gays destroying America:
"Someone must not be afriad to say, 'moral perversion is wrong.' If we do not act now, homosexuals will 'own' America! ... If you and I do not speak up now, this homosexual steamroller will literally crush all decent men, women, and children who get in its way...and our nation will pay a terrible price!"

On feminists:
I listen to feminists and all these radical gals - most of them are failures. They've blown it. Some of them have been married, but they married some Casper Milquetoast who asked permission to go to the bathroom. These women just need a man in the house. That's all they need. Most of the feminists need a man to tell them what time of day it is and to lead them home. And they blew it and they're mad at all men. Feminists hate men. They're sexist. They hate men - that's their problem.

On public schools:
"I hope I live to see the day when, as in the early days of our country, we won't have any public schools. The churches will have taken them over again and Christians will be running them. What a happy day that will be!"